Well hello everyone, Happy Sunday and Happy St. George’s Day!
Firstly, I’m sorry for the super long hiatus; work and life has been busy, and while I’ve been desperate to get back to the blog, it just hasn’t been possible for the last couple of months.
But I’m back now and keen to get stuck in! While I’ve had to let some of the much older items go (because they’re so old now they may as well have occurred in the 1800s), I will pick up on the newer (and ones that were too big to ignore).
So firstly…
Harry will attend the King’s Coronation
Yep… just when it almost looked like we were going to avoid having any of the Sussexes there at all, Harry has ‘taken one for the team’ and decided to attend his dad’s Coronation alone.
I must say, I’m fairly surprised at the fact Meghan didn’t jump at the chance of spending an entire day in front of the cameras at Westminster Abbey… maybe she watched footage back of The Queen’s funeral last year and realised the cameras barely skimmed over her, so couldn’t be arsed.
It has been said that instead, Harry will make a very brief visit for the day’s events, flying straight back to California for Archie’s birthday, which is on the same day.
I’m not really sure how one flies from the West Coast of the USA to London and back again in one day… A half an hour commute each way to work practically kills me. I can only assume this was Meghan’s idea?
It also took the Sussexes an inordinate amount of time to even respond to the invite, as though the Coronation plans hinged on them alone and that anyone actually gave a flying one whether they were going to attend or not.
Also, it has been said that Harry and Meghan were furious their kids were not asked to play a part in the Coronation ceremony itself…. which is weird, considering they didn’t confirm attendance until about ten minutes ago.
With Prince George of Wales set to have a starring role in his grandfather’s big day, Meghan and Harry were livid that Archie and Lili were relegated to being background players with zero responsibilities (which perfectly sums up Harry and Meghan’s roles within the BRF, to be honest).
However, I strongly suspect the real reason Meghan is not attending is because she knows she will be facing a barrage of scrutiny from both media and public.
Let’s face it, her appearance at The Queen’s funeral was hardly well received after she spent years causing stress towards the late monarch and in the lead-up to her death– but then had the audacity to try and look sad on the day.
“Shit Meghan– DUCK! Box of eggs at ten o’ clock flying towards your head!”
I don’t think I’m alone in saying I’m glad Meghan and the kids aren’t going to be here. They’d only try and turn it into the Sussex show and as much as I dislike Harry, we know that he on his own won’t do that at least. He’ll keep his head down and then thankfully fuck off back to Cali a few hours later.
As she’s fairly predictable, I’m willing to bet Meghan will release a photo of Archie on the day of the Coronation to mark his birthday– but that can’t be worse than the other thing that occurred recently…
Archie and Lili become Prince and Princess
Charles, mate…
Out of all the things I saw coming, this wasn’t one of them– especially since The King had said previously that he wanted a slimmed down monarchy, so I fail to see how he’s achieving that by giving two random kids who don’t even live here some royal titles.
Now of course, the Sussex supporters came out of the woodwork to say that ‘the kids SHOULD be given the titles’ as they ‘now eligible for them’.
As expected, Meghan practically wet her knickers in excitement and together with Harry, they put out a statement almost immediately, basically gloating that their kids finally got the titles ThEy So DeSeRvEd, like one of them had just won an Oscar or something.
The speed in which that ‘statement’ came out after Buckingham Palace updated the official website can only mean that Meghan had this sat in her email drafts since about 3 minutes after Lili’s umbilical cord was cut.
I didn’t actually bother thoroughly reading what they put out in the public domain– because at a brief glance, it really was some nauseating shit– but I think I can hazard a guess at the general theme… yet another lengthy passage from Markle, turning it into a story about herself.
I can only imagine how irritated William and Catherine must have been at this news: learning that Meghan finally gotten what she wanted all along must have been infuriating.
One thing that did make me laugh was how excited Sussex fans were about this– after they’d spent the last few years talking about how Harry and Meghan were ‘strong and independent’ and didn’t need shit from the British royal family… y’know, apart from the status, money, titles and platform… they were now out in force to celebrate.
Well, we can at least live in hope that they’ll be stripped of them once William becomes King and changes the letters privy to ensure that all four Sussex family members are left with nothing.
“Ah, well… that’s ok, babes– I’ve had the divorce lawyer on speed dial for a while now anyway. Still– we had a good run, eh?”
And now time for the standard palette cleanser…
Easter Sunday with the Royals
As is tradition, the Royal Family turned out in full force on Easter Sunday, heading over in the sunshine to St. George’s Chapel on the grounds of Windsor Castle for the usual Easter service.
“Would be better if you didn’t keep putting me in these ridiculous shorts where I can practically feel the wedgie in my throat, but ok.”
The family were led by The King and Queen Consort into the chapel, whereby all parties looked to be in good spirits.
The first Easter ceremony since Queen Elizabeth died, and the first with Charles as King, it was nice to see the family out– in particular the Wales kids, who seem to be getting more and more used to being in front of the cameras.
“Louis, it’s just the media, come on.”
“Nah, come back here mate, I’ll fucking deck ya!”
Perhaps Charlotte was having an easier time adjusting to growing up in the public eye?
“You better have Paw Patrol loaded on the iPad and a chilled chocolate milkshake in the cupholder. I’ve had enough of today.”
All in all, a nice Easter Sunday for the family and I’m sure the Wales family had a great time.
William and Kate in Birmingham
Continuing with the palette cleanser, last week, The Prince and Princess of Wales returned to official engagements following the Easter break with their kids, where they ventured over to the city of Birmingham for the day.
The couple travelled in to Birmingham by train from Windsor, there for the day to celebrate the city’s culture and find out more about the city.
The couple visited an Indian restaurant as one of their first stops, named Indian Streatery, where they got to work immediately– with William particularly keen to answer the phones.
With a call coming through to make a booking, and an unsuspecting customer on the other end who had no idea they were speaking to the future King, Prince William stepped in to ensure they got a table.
However, The Prince of Wales was having a bit of an issue with securing seating during a particularly busy period in the restaurant, so had to resort to trying to cram them wherever he could.
Eventually managing to sort the booking, William gave the address to the customer– but unfortunately, it was the wrong one. Mangling the street name, William turned to staff after getting off the phone and apologised for ‘probably sending the customer to the wrong address.”
But after simply discussing food, it was now time for the royal pair to try their hand at actually making some– which came in the form of frying rotis.
The Prince and Princess also discussed their love of curries– talking about how they ‘secretly try out’ many curry houses around the country.
But while Kate admitted she liked it ‘the spicier the better’, William announced that he prefers his ‘much milder’ as he is not a fan of spicy foods.
When asked if their children also enjoyed Indian food, Kate told the restaurant staff “absolutely, they love it.”
But on to the roti making, and in true royal engagement style, it was a competition between William and Catherine to see who made the best Indian flatbread.
Elsewhere, William was also getting stuck in– desperate to beat his wife in the competition.
But where food is usually discussed, so is drink– and the couple were only too happy to engage in discussion regarding their favourite alcoholic beverages.
While they have only ever really been spotted having the odd pint or glass of wine, it does appear that the future King and Queen Consort are partial to some slightly stronger drinks also…
Real talk though, William’s favourite tipple is vodka, along with enjoying a Kamikaze cocktail too, which he referred to as the ‘silent but deadly’.
But Catherine, on the other hand, has said that she ‘quite likes tequila’, which may have surprised many royal fans who believed her favourite drink was white wine.
Afterwards, it was time for a shot at darts, where the pair happily got stuck into the game, letting their competitive streaks show once again.
The game, which was actually interactive darts, gave William and Kate a chance to mingle with other guests in the 180 Club downstairs to the restaurant.
But it really does look like the Prince and Princess had a fun time in Birmingham and getting to meet the crowds and other locals. I’m sure they’ll be back again soon.
Well that’s it for now! There are more engagements coming this week now that the Wales’ have returned to public duties, so let’s wait and see what one brings.
Until then, have a great week, stay out of trouble and I’ll see you next time!
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